Just When I Was Ready to Despair

I've had just about enough. No, I'm not talking about the frustration of having an unemployed college graduate or the decision about which colleges might work for my h.s. senior, seriously, film school? Even that sounds less crazy based on how well doctors, lawyers, and businessman are doing right now.

No, I'm talking about summer TV. Yes, we have made some strides in that department, kudos to you USA and Bravo. You really do try. And yes, I adore the craftily debonair Neal Caffrey and Harvey Specter, who has been a delight on Suits, but what lawyer wins every case? The writers got a bit sloppy there towards the end. Heidi and Tim, please, we need talented designers who are actually interesting, not fake interesting. Where are Christian Siriano and Chris March when we need them?

The economy is in freefall, mother nature is playing with us, our enemies are hell-bent on trying to blow us up, and too many people we love are sick. We feel helpless, anxious, unworthy. There is so much to worry about especially our own impotence to change anything. And the political landscape. Let's not go there. The summer movies were ghastly, except for Harry Potter and based upon how many chose to stay outdoors rather than inside, it seemed as if most of America agrees with me. All we had left was our worry. I'm sick of worrying. It's unproductive and causes wrinkles.

I need my mindless TV shows back.

I don't drink or do drugs, but there are definitely some days I really, really wished I did. Instead, all I have to bolster my spirits is a strong cup of coffee and a chocolate danish. The five pounds I gained this summer I lay at the doorstep of the Democrats and the TV executives who aired nature and cooking shows, ad nauseum. Oh, and Yankee games that seemd to go on for eight hours. And yes, I do read books.

Finally, Fall TV brings with it the shiny promise of a new leaf, budding slowly and blossoming into something beautiful. 
But returning favorites first. Vampire Diaries! Gossip Girl! Yes, I am a fifty-year old in an arrested state of development. (No, I never watched it) Good Wife! You go Julianna. Grey's Anatomy! I'm still sticking with dark and twisty Meredith and soulfully dreamy Patrick Dempsey (I came up with McDreamy, but no one in my living was there as witness). I'm not blindly loyal, nah uh. You have to earn my loyalty and staying power. I left Lost for a period in the middle, but rallied in the last year. I had one question that needed answering. Where was that damn island, or rather what was it? My question was answered, sorta. That ending made me glad I'd never started watching The Sopranos. I can only take so much.

I've ratcheted up my DVR, erasing all the shows I never watched but recorded. Just in case.  Did you know that HD shows take up lots of disc space?

My son came into the den a couple of days ago and a quick glance at the screen had him shaking his head. "You're still watching Glee? No one watches Glee anymore," said the son who speaks in absolutes. I'm pretty sure they're still getting ratings, although I have to admit I fast-forward through a lot. They're on probabtion as of now. There are only so many hours I have allotted at night for entertainment.

Back in the day when my daughter still lived at home we would watch American Idol with our finger on fast forward. She wanted to scroll past the comments (too nasty) and I wanted to scroll through the contestants (too boring). Well, loopy Paula and sacrcastic Simon are back. I give them one episode of my time. If I even last that long.

So yes, i will try out Person of Interest and Charlie's Angels even if  I already know there will be no one as beautiful as Jaclyn Smith or as charmingly paternal as John Forsythe. It will take time to warm up to the new characters, to allow them to comfort me in ways pastry goods cannot. And I'm looking forward to reconnecting with some old friends.

I hate the taste of alcohol, the political race turns my stomach, but atleast something other than shrill housewives and shrill New Jerseyans and shrill Kardashians will finally be available to those of us who want a little more highbrow from our lowbrow viewing.

There is a fine line between between mindless and brain-numbing entertainment. I intend to walk that line. You are welcome to join me. Or better yet, go read a book.