...Or shall I say, the wife of Carlos Danger?
Cue the Zorro music...how fifteen-year-old pubescent a name is that? How incredibly, unbelievably, undeniably pathetic is this Abbott and Costello routine? Anthony and Huma, I can't tell anymore who the straight man is supposed to be. At least when we laughed at Costello we were sorta hoping he'd get a clue and figure things out at some point...we were rooting for him. But with this pathetic Mayor-wanna-be of the Super Ego, it is sad, so very, very sad. Actually, maybe that's the name he should have emblazoned onto his cape...Captain Super Ego. Huma, start stitching, after all, isn't your role supposed to be...well, whatever Anthony decides it should be?
Huma, Huma, where have you gone?
Let me tell you what I think a good spouse's role ought to be.
A good spouse is a sounding board, available to rein in juvenile behavior, or less than stellar judgment.
A good spouse is the sane voice, the voice of reason when the other half is about to act ridiculous.
A good spouse will let you know if your bright new idea is really the next big thing, or a harebrained scheme.
A good spouse is supposed to stop their other half from attending a
best friend's engagement party in shorts when the invite calls
for formal wear.
And in the event that the spouse is still hell-bent on acting like a moron, a smart spouse will say, 'You know what, dear? You can wear purple shorts to the New York Hilton for Simon's engagement party--but I won't be going with you.'
Huma, why have you joined Anthony at the party?
A functioning marriage that is built on respect, mutual love and admiration, is one where you are encouraged to be the best you can be; where you feel comfortable taking a chance to spread your wings and challenge your skills to their fullest while your spouse is standing in the "Amen" corner.
A good spouse in a functioning relationship looks out for you and never knowingly puts you in an awkward position.
A good spouse is supposed to tell your when you have spinach in your teeth, or you're trailing toilet paper on your heel.
A good spouse is supposed to stop you from acting foolish.
In this regard the Weiners have failed each other. The Anthony and Huma show is like a Saturday Night Live sketch that has gone on too long.
Huma, I don't know what this smarmy guy has over you, but he has twisted you so far that you aren't functioning as the thinking, intelligent woman I'm assuming you to be. If you are hanging in for your son, let me tell you, a man who disrespects women on the grand and public scale that your husband has is no role model.
Huma, take your dignity and grace and leave him. Your husband doesn't respect you, but please, regain your own self-respect. Think of your child's future, and your political one, which will be a lot stronger if you stay hitched to Hillary than to Anthony. Take your ambitions and your smarts and reclaim yourself.
Do it for your child.
Do it for yourself.
Do it for women everywhere.